I'm LOST

I'm lost, and not just any paths or roads on this world,it's my life which I need to go on for maybe another half of decade. I had spent quiet a portion of my 18 life facing various obstacles,some ended quiet well but some just terrible. Somehow after these painful experience, I'm not me anymore. I'm not easy-going and caring, mostly spent most of my time gloomy and sad, I just bury my head into the sand and built up an protective shell for me,to avoid getting in touch with those terrifying problems.

Till now, after my dear friend exploded to me then I know I'm really off my track, I simply cant remember who I really is,all that is in my mind are those memories of being betrayed, being dumped and any other bad things at people who done to me. I hardly felt anything for the past years as I had shut down my thoughts and feelings. For such person like me, of course I denied his claim at first. But after listen his explanation, deep down inside me knew he is right. It was really hard at first, to tear open the well bandaged wounds, slowly take down the shell which I set up. I cried for most of the time. Thinking back those memories, analyses them in different point of view. But as you slowly proceeding this, you are unattaching those bad memories, seeing it as just an old path of you, you just felt free and gleeful. I had never felt this great before, it was like all this burden I had dumped away and I'm myself again. I don't need to be somebody who everyone wants me too, I'm just me meeeee :) Still now I still having some trouble with of low self esteem prob, but dont worried I will sort it out :)

Thanks for reading my blog tentatively. Have a great day :) I'm gonna blast off , woohoo